BEDA fail and 30-year-old me

I fail at BEDA...my month has been more stressful than I thought and my endeavors have not been very blog worthy so I just sort of gave up. So, I'll give a brief update. Sinnce the last time I posted I've:

-Started, and finished, Firefly (I adore Kaylee <3)
-Finished rewatching the 5th season of Buffy
-Half way through my reread of Alaska (been failing on the reading front...)
-Dealt with my messed up and ultimately lost financial aid package for college
-Been trying desperately to get ahold of the dean to get stuff together for my thesis (he finally answered today, it took him over a month!)

So that's why I haven't been blogging, not very fun stuff (besides the first 3.)

BUT I am back today after watching both Charlie and Kayley's videos to their 30-year-old selves. I thought this might be fun so I've decided to make a blog post about this. So, to a 30-year-old Sarah hello and how are ya? :)

Dear 30-year-old me,

Right now, you're 11 days from turning 19! You love your birthday and I hope that doesn't change as you get older like it does for some. You're about to start your final year of undergrad and start applying for grad school. Now, I hope you're still a Ravenclaw and love school and learning, but I also want you to be done with school by now...I know now you are(I am?) debating about whether you want to stop at Masters or go on to your PhD or PsyD. I hope whatever decision you(I?) made ends up being the right choice for you/me.

Now hopefully you're bored with talking about that and want to get onto more fun topics! I really hope you still go to HP conferences and wrock concerts (if they are still around.) I also hope you still love to read and watch 5AG and vlogbrothers on YouTube because, right now, the HP fandom and Nerdfighteria and huge parts of your life. I also hope you still adore Buffy and take it as seriously as you do currently. Now, I know I just watched it and discovered it's beauty less than a year ago, but this series really changed your life and the way you think and approach the world.

On this topic, I hope you were able to make your thesis on Buffy work at some point through your educational career because I believe doing so would be something you'd be very proud of yourself for. Right now, you pride yourself, as well as struggle with, being a fan as well as an academic. It seems so clear to you but others don't seem to understand. I hope you remained true to yourself and did what you thought was right.

At this point, I'm guessing you're very focused on your career (hopefully still counselling in gender and sexual identity!) and probably aren't married or have a family. However, I do hope you have had, or currently had, at least one serious girlfriend by the time. You're very jaded and driven now which is not a good combination for creating a relationship but I want you t experience it at least once in you're life.

I hope you have tons of dogs. I hope however that you still remember Noah and how much you loved him. Right now he's 12 and he's your best friend and you can't imagine life without him. I hope you're able to love others dogs as deeply as you loved him but I don't know if you could...

I hope you still are as close with Ryan, Tara, and your sister. They're very important to you know and I hope they remain that way.

Most of all, Sarah, I hope you're happy. You love deeply and feel strongly and I very much hope you still are in essence the same as who you are now. I don't want you to grow up or chain unless you want to. Just recently you've begun to have confidence in yourself and I hope that remains. You've had some hard times but right now you're happy and I hope the same still holds true.

And on one last night, I hope you can still quote every season of Friends! It comes in handy (no it doesn't, but you enjoy doing it.)

Best Wishes,

The 18-year-old you